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Archive for August, 2011

July 18, 2007-July 19, 2007 – I was at Dave’s.  Jeff was there, too.  We were watching a video from a series of videos that Jeff and I used to watch in grade school.  It was a cartoon with sepia-toned animation.  It was something about Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.  It was in a foreign language.  As we were watching the opening credits, Jeff was like, “See, it’s in Spanish.”  Then, after the credits ended, there was some narration with subtitles, telling the story of Charlie.  I looked at my watch.  It was 2:00 AM.  I decided to go to bed.  Dave and I walked downstairs, and he told me I had to put my clothes and my towel in a certain spot.  I saw my towel lying down somewhere on the floor.

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January 1, 2007-January 2, 2007 – I was watching the playoff game between the Cowboys and Seahawks.  Instead of Tony Romo, Kyle Lyons – a former fellow movie theatre usher – was Dallas’ QB.  He threw a pass to Michael Irvin, who caught it for the first down.  On the next play, he threw it to him again.  He was completely open, but he had to slide to make the catch.  Then I was Michael Irvin.  I bobbled the ball, bouncing it about 4 or 5 times before making the catch.  Then, Michael got up.  He only had two people to beat: Cher, who was coming up on the sideline, and someone on the Seahawks, who was running down, trying to cut off the middle.  Michael cut into the middle and got by both of them.  But he didn’t stop running.  He went through a door at the end of the field.  He kept running through doors, going through complexes of streets, stores, and parking lots.

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July 18, 2011-July 19, 2011 – I was watching Seinfeld.  It was the episode, or a series of episodes, that included the time that George asked Susan to marry him.  Themes being explored were married life and how married life can make matters uncomfortable, especially as it related to George.  After watching for some time, I was putting away some shirts that werre sitting on my bed while thinking about the scene in which Jerry told the wedding news to Elaine.  I kept running through it in my head.  I got stuck at the spot when Jerry said, “George (pause) Costanza.”  I went through that in my head several times while putting my shirts away.  The last few shirts were rather difficult; they felt strangely heavy.

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February 25, 2011-February 26, 2011 – I was watching a countdown show.  (It might have been VH1 Top 20.)  There was at least one, or maybe a few surprising entrants in the middle of the countdown.

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October 14, 2010-October 15, 2010 – Whoopi Goldberg was the host of a new late-night talk show.  I was going to be one of the guests on tonight’s show, but it wasn’t certain that there was going to be a show tonight, as it was a Saturday.  About three minutes before showtime, it was determined that the show was happening.  So Whoopi said, “Well, okay,” and got things started.  I was the first guest mentioned in the opening sequence, as I was going to be the first guest.  The other guests were Katharine Heigl, Josh Duhamel, the baby from Raising Hope, and one other person.  They all also came out at the beginning of the show.  Katharine was carrying the baby.  I made sure to get the prime seat, as I was the first guest.  As soon as they sat down, the baby threw up.  Katharine handed the baby to Josh.  I yelled at Josh to go get something to clean up the mess.  I wasn’t going to get up, as I was the first guest.

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The Fattest Woman Ever?

April 1, 2010-April 2, 2010 – I was watching a (very) pregnant woman looking at herself in the mirror.  She was in her underwear or a bikini.  She was saying something to the cameraman (or whomever else was there) that this pregnancy had led her to set the record for being the fattest woman ever.  This was rather interesting, considering that she was rather skinny while not pregnant.  I wasn’t entirely sure I believed her claim, but I was leaning towards accepting it.

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I Sense the Killer

November 29, 2009-November 30, 2009 – I was worried that I was going to be attacked by the killer from Halloween.  I wasn’t thinking of him as “Michael Myers” while I was worrying; I didn’t have any name in mind.  It might have been Halloween, or it was Halloween time, so Halloween was on TV.  I watched some of the beginning.  It was different.  The killer’s methods had been changed.  Also, Jamie Lee Curtis was nowhere to be seen.  I went to my bed to lie down.  After a while, Mom came home.  Then it didn’t seem like there was any reason to worry about the killer anymore.

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