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Gymnasium Bang! Bang!

April 11, 2019-April 12, 2019 – I was on a podcast. We were recording way up on the top of the rafters in a gymnasium. Scott Aukerman was hosting, and there was one other guest besides me. It kind of felt like Comedy Bang! Bang!, but I don’t think it quite was. Towards the end of the episode, Scott had us play a game. He gave us a phrase as an answer, and we had to guess the question.

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I’m an All-Star!

March 17, 2019-March 18, 2019 – I was competing in the Jeopardy! All-Star Games. My teammates were Julia and Ben. Julia played in the first round of the first game. It looked like we were playing in the family room at my parents’ house. After the first commercial break, I was watching the game on a monitor in another room. Julia was being interviewed. The producers were stretching out the game to have it last two episodes. Going into Double Jeopardy, it looked like I was going to play this round. But then Ben said that he wanted it which meant I would play Final in this game and then probably Double in the next game. I was a little wary of playing Double in the next game, as I would probably be up against Roger Craig. It would be tough as a newbie going against someone so fast on the buzzer. I went backstage quick and saw that Julia was feeling really sick. She didn’t think she could do any round except Final for the next game. I came back and reported this to Ben, which changed our strategy a bit. But it looked like Ben could still take Double today.

In the Line of Fire

March 17, 2019-March 18, 2019 – I was involved in something that led to some people going after my family. Yvette Nicole Brown ran over to the hospital, despite the great risk. The lobby there was completely empty. Then there was a guy standing behind Yvette and two guys with a gun on the other side. The lights went out and a shot was fired. The light came back on. Yvette had been replaced by a trench coat hanging over a mannequin.

RuPaul’s Mud Race

February 15, 2019-February 16, 2019 – I was hanging out with the other queens of the most recent RuPaul’s Drag Race season, which had just ended. We were outside some building that might have been a studio. It was sunny out and felt like mid-spring. I was one of the winners, along with Monét X Change. I had been given a robe to wear that had recently been returned. There was a pouch hanging below the crotch area. It felt like there was something in there. Ru gathered us all over to a field across the street to talk to us. It looked like a graveyard. It was pretty much impossible to avoid sitting in mud or dirt. Ru didn’t look like Ru, but instead like someone significantly younger. He was talking about how a bunch of clothes that they once had to give away had recently been returned. But unfortunately they had unavoidably become shit-stained. I pulled the pouch off my robe. It looked like a diaper filled with poop.

Seven Doggone Army

January 29, 2019-January 30, 2019 – I walked into some back room where snacks were laid out on tables. #2 on the Greatest Super Bowl Commercials came on. This was an ad from last year. It featured someone with dog treats leading huskies across a room and making them bark to the tune of the main riff of “Seven Nation Army.” The final note happened by us dunking our hands into the ice of a drink cooler. So I did that. I wanted to grab a cherry cola. Then I had to go to the bathroom. There was an attendant who was weirdly stationed by the urinals. He was currently facing the wall.

Waiting for The Dude

January 11, 2019-January 12, 2019 – I was watching The Big Lebowski. It was an early scene at the bowling alley. John Goodman’s character pulled a gun out on his teammate while they were sitting at their lane. It was taking a while for him to put away the gun. It was getting a little uncomfortable. I was waiting for The Dude to show up.

CREDIT: Sony/VH1

(NOTE: In my dreams, celebrities usually appear as conflations of themselves and the characters they play.  So if a dream takes place in a movie or TV show, then its characters are usually also the actors that play them.  There a few exceptions: animated characters generally are not counted this way, as they don’t tend to have this same conflated quality.  So, an appearance by Bob Belcher would not also count as an appearance by H. Jon Benjamin.  Also, for fictional characters that have had multiple iterations: an appearance by Mary Poppins counts as an appearance by Emily Blunt only if it is the version of Poppins as played by Blunt.)

It somehow just feels right that RuPaul and Alex Trebek are tied for first.

RuPaul – 5
Alex Trebek – 5

Donald Trump – 4

Johnny Galecki – 3 (each time as Leonard Hofstadter)
Chris Gethard – 3
Simon Helberg – 3 (each time as Howard Wolowitz)
Kyle Mooney – 3
Kunal Nayyar – 3 (each time as Raj Koothrappali) – 3
Jim Parsons – 3 (each time as Sheldon Cooper) – 3
Adam Scott – 3 (once as Max Jennifer from Ghosted)

Pete Davidson – 2
Zooey Deschanel – 2 (both times as Jess Day)
Billy Eichner – 2
Will Forte – 2 (once as Phil Tandy Miller)
Monique Heart – 2
John Krasinski – 2
Brie Larson – 2
Ginger Minj – 2
Bobby Moynihan – 2 (once as Alex Riley)
Bob Odenkirk – 2
Issa Rae – 2 (once as Issa Dee)
Paul Rudd – 2
Emma Stone – 2

Ben Affleck – 1
Aja (Drag Queen) – 1
Tyler Alvarez – 1 (as Peter Maldonado)
Anthony Anderson – 1
Blake Anderson – 1
Louie Anderson – 1
Jennifer Aniston – 1
KJ Apa – 1 (as Archie Andrews)
Allisyn Ashley Arm – 1 (as Heather from A.P. Bio)
Fred Armisen – 1
Scott Aukerman – 1
Stone Cold Steve Austin – 1
Ashleigh Barty – 1
Paul Begala – 1
Candice Bergen – 1
Mayim Bialik – 1 (as Amy Farrah Fowler)
Big Bird – 1
Maame Biney – 1
Emily Blunt – 1
Jim Boeheim – 1
Bowser – 1
Tom Brady – 1
Josh Brener – 1
Alison Brie – 1
Aparna Brielle – 1 (as Sarika from A.P. Bio)
George W. Bush – 1
Jim Carrey – 1 (as Truman Burbank)
Jon Cena – 1
Kim Chi – 1
John Cleese – 1
Deon Cole – 1 (as Charlie Telphy)
Jodie Comer – 1 (as Villanelle)
Kevin Corrigan – 1
Tom Cruise – 1
Kennedy Davenport – 1
Charlie Day – 1 (as Charlie Kelly)
Adam DeVine – 1
Erica Durance – 1 (as Lois Lane)
Idris Elba – 1
Dakota Fanning – 1
Chris Farley – 1
Will Ferrell – 1
Chuckie Finster – 1
Gal Gadot – 1
Zach Galifianakis – 1
Teri Garr – 1
Ana Gasteyer – 1
Robin Givens – 1 (as Sierra McCoy)
Ilana Glazer – 1 (as Ilana Wexler)
Donald Glover – 1 (as Earn)
Griffin Gluck – 1 (as Sam Ecklund)
Ariana Grande – 1
Draymond Green – 1
Bill Hader – 1
Tom Hanks – 1
Justin Hartley – 1 (as Oliver Queen)
Anders Holm – 1
BoJack Horseman – 1
Allen Iverson – 1
Alex Jacob – 1
Abbi Jacobson – 1 (as Abbi Abrams)
Jameela Jamil – 1 (as Tahani Al-Jami)
Scarlett Johansson – 1
Dwayne Johnson – 1
Jake Johnson – 1 (as Nick Miller)
Dru Johnston – 1
Jerry Jones – 1
Michael Jordan – 1
Mindy Kaling – 1
Katya (drag queen) – 1
Keegan-Michael Key – 1
Stan Lee – 1
John Legend – 1
Eugene Levy – 1
Jane Levy – 1
Jennifer Lewis – 1 (as Ruby Johnson)
Julia Louis-Dreyfus – 1 (as Elaine Benes)
Kyle MacLachlan – 1 (as Mr. Mayor)
Rami Malek – 1
Jason Mantzoukas – 1
Mastodon – 1
James McAvoy – 1 (as Kevin Wendell Crumb)
Melissa McCarthy – 1
John McLaughlin – 1
Camila Mendes – 1
Jason Momoa – 1
Jack Nicholson – 1
Amy Renee Noonan (of Karmin) – 1
Sandra Oh – 1 (as Eve Polastri)
Asia O’Hara – 1
Catherine O’Hara – 1
Kaitlin Olson – 1 (as Dee Reynolds)
Isaih Pacheco – 1
Teresa Palmer – 1
Ralphie Parker – 1
Randy Parker – 1
Emo Philips – 1
Karolina Pliskova – 1
Kevin Pollak – 1
Mary Poppins – 1
Esther Povitsky – 1
Adam Ray – 1 (as Officer Crowder from American Vandal)
Rex Reed – 1
John C. Reilly – 1 (as Dewey Cox)
Matthew Rhys – 1 (as Philip Jennings)
Britt Robertson – 1
Nick Robinson – 1 (as Simon)
Austin Rogers – 1
Saoirse Ronan – 1
Keri Russell – 1 (as Elizabeth Jennings)
Rick Sanchez – 1
Bernie Sanders – 1
Paul Scheer – 1
Amy Schumer – 1
Yara Shahidi – 1
Shangela – 1
Luke Skywalker – 1
Wesley Snipes – 1
Kevin Spacey – 1
David Spade – 1 (as Joe Dirt)
Ryan Stiles – 1
Jerry Stiller – 1
Holly Taylor – 1 (as Paige Jennings)
Kristin Scott Thomas – 1
Kenan Thompson – 1
Jesse Thorn – 1
Melania Trump – 1
Liv Tyler – 1
Jessica Walter – 1 (as Lucille Bluth)
Elizabeth Warren – 1
Damon Wayans, Jr. – 1 (as Coach)
Betty White – 1
Serena Williams – 1
Venus Williams – 1
Bruce Willis – 1 (as David Dunn)
Oprah Winfrey – 1
Tommy Wiseau – 1
Reese Witherspoon – 1
Yoda – 1